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Wednesday, December 8, 2021

Duly Elected Tyrant Uses Lawful Constitutional Authority to Give OSHA New COVID Vaccine Mandate

WASHINGTON, D.C. — A stunned MAGA nation looked on in horror yesterday as Comrade Joe Biden (D-SOCIALISM) — duly elected tyrant — used powers lawfully given to him by the Constitution to order OSHA to issue an emergency mandate regarding COVID-19 vaccinations.

In a clearly fascistic move, Biden — who was elected in a decisive manner back last November — viciously and callously used his legal authority, granted to him by the American people themselves, to direct OSHA to mandate all firms with a hundred or more employees to have their staff fully vaccinated. Those who refuse vaccination will have to submit to weekly testing. Both moves were made, said the freely and fairly elected public servant/tyrannical dictator, in an effort to curtail the COVID-19′ delta variant. OSHA is a federal agency in charge of maintaining safe work environments in every American company, but it didn’t take long for Emperor Biden’s brave resistance to make their hurt feelings known.

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“This is just a bridge too far. Biden should not only be impeached for being a Democrat,” Sen. Ted Cruz (Q-CANCUN) told Fox News hosts this morning, “he should be tried for treason and impeached a second time for caring about the health and safety of workers too much. It’s not the president’s job to care, but clearly Joe doesn’t know that, and for this he simply must be stripped of his powers, which the people of America gave him when they fired Donald Trump last fall.”

Freshman congresshorse Rep. Marjorie Taylor Greene (Q-GA) ripped Biden and said she would “ensure the Q-Army holds Sleepy Toe-Teepy Joe Biden accountable.”

“This guy thinks that just because millions of Americans gave him the job, and that because the Constitution says he can, that he has a right to direct a federal agency to do things,” Greene said while also smoking crack on Steve Bannon’s podcast. “But, Steve, these libtards aren’t taking into account that we have big guns and even bigger hurt feelings, and the Second Amendment says we have a total and absolute right to murder commies if they try to force us to get a life saving vaccine so our hospitals stop filling up with MAGAs hopped on horse paste.”

Greene vowed to have Trump address the situation when he was restored to power “by Decembuly 48th” of this year.

“You just wait and see what me and Mike Lindell and our crack dealer have in store, fam,” Greene teased. “It’s gonna be off the chain, or whatever the urbans are saying these days!”

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Writer/comedian James Schlarmann is the founder of The Political Garbage Chute and his work has been featured on The Huffington Post. You can follow James on Facebook, Spotify, and Instagram, but not Twitter because Twitter is a cesspool.

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James Schlarmannhttp://facebook.com/JamboSchlarmbo
Comedian, writer, semi-amateur burrito wrangler and platypus aficionado, James cannot and will not be pigeonholed by anyone's expectations. Unless you want to pay him money, in which case his principles are as malleable as his "children" are "in need of food." Winner of absolutely zero lifetime achievement awards. You should definitely not give a shit about his opinions. James' satire is also found on: Alternative Facts, Alternative Science, The Political Garbage Chute, The Pastiche Post, Satirical Facts Hire James to create (very likely) funny content.
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