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Thursday, September 28, 2023

Rumble Offers Joe Rogan $100 Million to Wear a MAGA Hat and Just Shout the N-Word

A YouTube competitor has offered podcaster Joe Rogan $100 million to jump ship and leave Spotify, if he agrees to post clips of his show exclusively to their servers.

Rumble — a streaming video service partially owned by thrice-failed congressional candidate Dan Bongino — has reportedly sent an official offer to to Rogan, who has come under fire repeatedly in recent weeks for the content of his show. Spotify made Rogan the most lucrative deal in podcasting history when it gave Rogan $100 million to be the exclusive audio home of his podcast, The Joe Rogan Experience. 

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However, public outcry over anti-vaccine and COVID-19 information erupted last week, and that was before artist India Arie, who had her music pulled from Spotify in protest of Rogan, posted a devastating clip of him using the N-word slur dozens of times on his show.

Mr. Rogan has already attempted damage control in a lengthy apology video posted to his various social media accounts. If Rogan accepts Rumble’s offer, however, he will be asked to delete that apology video, and agree to to very specific terms of employment.

“What we’re hearing is that the official offer is for Joe to post several videos each day in which he just shouts the N-word over and over. Non-stop. Just, repeating it ad nauseum,” one source told us.

“Rumble sees this as a way to capitalize on a nexus of their users and Rogan’s listeners. They have data that indicates if you listen to Joe Rogan and/or fuck your cousin, you probably watch at least a handful of vides on Rumble each day. If Rogan joins Rumble, they can really blow their membership and view numbers way, way up.”

Rumble has given Rogan until the end of the week to make up his mind.

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Writer/comedian James Schlarmann is the founder of The Political Garbage Chute and his work has been featured on The Huffington Post. You can follow James on Facebook, Spotify, and Instagram, but not Twitter because Twitter is a cesspool.

James Schlarmann
James Schlarmannhttp://facebook.com/JamboSchlarmbo
Comedian, writer, semi-amateur burrito wrangler and platypus aficionado, James cannot and will not be pigeonholed by anyone's expectations. Unless you want to pay him money, in which case his principles are as malleable as his "children" are "in need of food." Winner of absolutely zero lifetime achievement awards. You should definitely not give a shit about his opinions. James' satire is also found on: Alternative Facts, Alternative Science, The Political Garbage Chute, The Pastiche Post, Satirical Facts Hire James to create (very likely) funny content.
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