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Monday, June 5, 2023

Trump: “Ashli Babbitt Was the Hottest Nazi Babe I’ve Seen Since My Own Ivanka”

This weekend, former one term, twice forever impeached President Donald J. Trump recorded a special video in tribute to fallen MAGA martyr and domestic terrorist Ashli Babbitt. In the video, Trump wished Babbitt — who died during the former president’s failed insurrection attempt on January 6th — a happy birthday and demanded the Department of Justice re-open the investigation into her death, after the officer who shot and killed Babbitt has already been exonerated.

You can see Trump’s message for Babbitt’s family in the tweet below:

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Ms. Babbitt has become somewhat of a martyr to pro-MAGA Americans, despite the fact that she was killed while unlawfully attempting to break into Congress and stop the certification of the 2020 election. Babbitt has widely been believed to be heavily influenced by the Q-Anon conspiracy theory, and Trump’s reality-deficient claims that the election was stolen from him. In a follow-up interview on Sean Hannity’s radio program, Trump defended making the birthday video for Babbitt, who attacked the very seat of democracy in his name.

“Sean, I just think Ashland, Ash baseball bat, you know, whatever her name is? I think she’s a real American hero, and when the throne is rightfully mine again, I will honor her in some big, bigly way,” Trump promised Hannity. “I mean, I think what she did in the name of MAGA is important, but quite frankly hot pieces off ass like her, or my daughter IVANKA, they deserve statues and tributes just for being hot.”

Trump then heaped even more compliments on Babbitt and his daughter.

“Quite frankly, Ashli Babbitt was the hottest Nazi babe I’ve seen since my own Ivanka,” Trump continued, “and call me old fashioned, or whatever, but being sexually appealing to the president — the FOREVER PRESIDENT — used to mean something important in this country. I plan to get our country back there again. Make America Appreciative of Sexy Nazis Again, that’s my new slogan. It’s great huh?”

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Writer/comedian James Schlarmann is the founder of The Political Garbage Chute and his work has been featured on The Huffington Post. You can follow James on Facebook, Spotify, and Instagram, but not Twitter because Twitter is a cesspool.

James Schlarmann
James Schlarmannhttp://facebook.com/JamboSchlarmbo
Comedian, writer, semi-amateur burrito wrangler and platypus aficionado, James cannot and will not be pigeonholed by anyone's expectations. Unless you want to pay him money, in which case his principles are as malleable as his "children" are "in need of food." Winner of absolutely zero lifetime achievement awards. You should definitely not give a shit about his opinions. James' satire is also found on: Alternative Facts, Alternative Science, The Political Garbage Chute, The Pastiche Post, Satirical Facts Hire James to create (very likely) funny content.
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