This week, scandal broke loose at one of the three major cable news dumpster fires, costing President Jeff Zucker his position.
Zucker, a former NBC executive who famously inserted a double-ended dildo shaped like alleged comedian Jay Leno into every orifice of Conan O’Brien, resigned after an internal investigation into another PR nightmare rocked CNN. The inappropriate nature of former CNN anchor Chris Cuomo and his brother, disgraced (if politicians were genetically cable of feeling shame) former New York Governor Andrew Cuomo, revealed that Zucker had a secret of his own.
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That secret, cost Zucker his position.
“As part of the investigation into Chris Cuomo’s tenure at CNN, I was asked about a consensual relationship with my closest colleague, someone I have worked with for more than 20 years,” Zucker told employees in a memo. “I acknowledged the relationship evolved in recent years. I was required to disclose it when it began but I didn’t. I was wrong. As a result, I am resigning today.” (CNN)
In the wake of Zucker’s shameful exit from CNN, two former Fox News hosts and primetime predators wasted no time dunking on him publicly. In tweets, semi-sentient Jell-o mold Eric Bolling and nine-foot tall, handsy drunk uncle Bill O’Reilly, mocked and ridiculed Zucker.
“Beta? Zucker had to resign because he was getting it on the regular from the same woman. Cuck? If you don’t have the cajones to fondle multiple women, you deserve to be cancelled,” O’Reilly tweeted. “Man up and gross out more than one woman, next time, Zucker.”
“Very wrong to have such an inappropriate relationship with an employee. That’s what I told Megyn Kelly in the last dick pick I sent her,” Bolling knocked Zucker in a tweet.
Bolling then tweeted out a dick pic.
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Writer/comedian James Schlarmann is the founder of The Political Garbage Chute and his work has been featured on The Huffington Post. You can follow James on Facebook, Spotify, and Instagram, but not Twitter because Twitter is a cesspool.