James Schlarmann

Comedian, writer, semi-amateur burrito wrangler and platypus aficionado, James cannot and will not be pigeonholed by anyone's expectations. Unless you want to pay him money, in which case his principles are as malleable as his "children" are "in need of food." Winner of absolutely zero lifetime achievement awards. You should definitely not give a shit about his opinions. James' satire is also found on: Alternative Facts, Alternative Science, The Political Garbage Chute, The Pastiche Post, Satirical Facts Hire James to create (very likely) funny content.

Trump Administration Will Start Giving Biden Transition Team Covfefe Briefings

WASHINGTON, D.C. — Though he seems intent on never technically conceding that he lost, ...

Obama Reminds Biden White House Trash Day is Tuesday

UNDISCLOSED SHARIA BUNKER, SOMEWHERE IN KENYA — Former President Barack Obama worked with President-elect ...

Impeached Sore Loser Continues to Pout Like a Bitch

WASHINGTON, D.C. — More than two weeks ago, the country decided to fire Donald ...

Disappointed Stephen Miller Finds Out the Klan Doesn’t Offer Healthcare or 401kkk

WASHINGTON, D.C. — This morning, soon to be former White House senior adviser Stephen ...