Lincoln’s Ghost Offers to Take Trump on Tour of Ford’s Theater

WASHINGTON, D.C. — When President Donald J. Trump told Fox News host Martha MacCallum ...

Armed Protesters Demand Their Right to Domestic Terrorism for Haircuts

DERP CITY, MICHIGAN — Dozens of armed mouth-breathers stormed a local government office this ...

Trump Campaign Sells Out $500 Candles That Smell Like President’s Butthole

WASHINGTON, D.C.  — The Trump 2020 Re-Election campaign announced this weekend that they have ...

Roger Stone Wants Conjugal Visits With Trump’s Ass

WASHINGTON, D.C — Last month, Federal District Judge Amy Berman Jackson sentenced Roger Stone, ...

Trump Demands Obama’s Long Form Biden Endorsement

WASHINGTON, D.C. — Yesterday, former President Barack Obama endorsed the presidential campaign of his ...

McConnell Says Trump’s Dick Tastes Like ‘Total Authority’ to Him

COAL BONER, KENTUCKY — President Donald Trump suggested during a recent coronavirus task force ...

Bernie Sanders to Send What’s Left of His Vocal Cords to Presidential Election Hall of Fame

WASHINGTON, D.C. — Senator Bernie Sanders of Vermont will not be the Democratic Party’s ...

Local MAGA-Boy Confused How He Got ‘The COVID’ After Taking Trump’s Snakeoil for Three Years

COLD CAVE HILLS, TENNESSEE — Right-ing Youtube star, podcaster, singer/songwriter and frequent AltFacts video ...