Tag: Coronavirus

President Worries Never-Trumpers Are Dying of COVID-19 to Make Him ‘Look Bad’

WASHINGTON, D.C. — At the time of publication, the United States has suffered 83, ...

Coronavirus Worries About Its Exposure to Stephen Miller

WASHINGTON, D.C. — As the country wakes up and reads more and more reports ...

Pat Robertson: “Jesus Died For Your Sins. The Least You Can Do Is Die For Trump’s Economy.”

VIRGINIA BEACH, VIRGINIA — Televangelist Pat Robertson hasn’t done much to hide his support ...

President Promises Americans ‘The Trump Steak of Coronavirus Vaccines’

WASHINGTON, D.C. — President Donald J. Trump told the American people today that they ...

ISIS Claims Responsibility for Coronavirus Quarantine Protests

UNDISCLOSED LOCATION — The terrorist organization known as ISIS has released a new video ...

Armed Protesters Demand Their Right to Domestic Terrorism for Haircuts

DERP CITY, MICHIGAN — Dozens of armed mouth-breathers stormed a local government office this ...

Lindsey Graham Doesn’t Think Senate Should Return Until He Can Fit His Mask Over Trump’s Nuts

WASHINGTON, D.C. — Senator Lindsey Graham (R-SC) can be counted among the elected Republicans ...

Trump Reassures First Lady Coronavirus Is Not Sexually Transmitted

WASHINGTON, D.C. — This afternoon, the president held a press event in the White ...