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Lifestyle

Local MAGA Boy: Nike Should ‘Make It Up To’ Trump Supporters and Put Flaming T’s On Their Shoes

James Schlarmann - 0
COLD CAVE HILLS, TENNESSEE -- Right-wing podcaster and country music singer/songwriter Jethro Bohiggins has already taken all his Nike shoes and burned them, he...
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Sports

Confused White Guy Agrees With New NFL National Anthem Policy (VIDEO)

James Schlarmann - 0
Everyone's favorite Confused White Guy took to the Internet this past week and uploaded a new video, this time discussing the National Football League's...
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Sports

T-Bone Lahren Wants President of Carolinas To Forbid Sale Of Panthers To P-Diddy

James Schlarmann - 0
SIN CEREBRO, TEXAS -- Timpani Lahren, the feisty blonde conservative commentator and Fox News screeching racist magpie, went on a verbal rampage during a...
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Sports

Putin Furious Trump Hasn’t Asked NFL Players To Stand For Russian National Anthem Yet

James Schlarmann - 0
"I know not to leave Daddy waiting too long."
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Sports

Trump Suspends First Amendment For “Disrespectful Urbans Who Play Pro Sports”

James Schlarmann - 0
"Nowhere in the Constitution does it say that urbans are allowed to make white people think."
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TV

Tambourine Lahren’s Head Literally Explodes On-Air When She Finds Out GQ Named Kaepernick “Citizen of the Year”

James Schlarmann - 0
"WHY COME YOU GIVE AWARD TO KAEPERNICK?!"
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Sports

Trump Thinks Black Athletes ‘Pose a Bigger Threat to American Security Than Nazis’

James Schlarmann - 0
"Certain members of my base are really off-put by what black people do in general."
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Business

Papa John’s Briefly Considered Switching to “Less Diarrhea-tastic” Recipe Before Blaming Uppity Blacks for Flagging Sales

James Schlarmann - 0
"We realized it was actually uppity black people peacefully protesting that was making our pizza taste like shit."
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Sports

Cop Stops Beating Black Man Long Enough to Agree With Trump That NFL Players Are Disrespectful Jerks

James Schlarmann - 0
"What are they even protesting, anyway?"
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Sports

Trump Demands Congress Strip NFL and Its Players of First Amendment Rights

James Schlarmann - 0
"That arcane constitution really should be reviewed."
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